Friday, September 12
Moving along with more love… I’m feeling indulgent. There are all kinds of examples of love that can really surprise you, examples that show you a different kind or side of love, or even yourself.
Take for instance my change in plans this evening. Initially, I was going to meet the girls for a game of tennis and then dinner and a movie. But, for different reasons, changes in plans opened up my evening.
I got home, changed and then drove over to the driving range. I hit a large bucket of balls and I was having a blast. I was hitting each club consistently well as I worked through the drills I picked up when I took a series of refresher lessons at Triology Golf Club when I lived in Redmond, Washington last summer. I loved my teacher – a pro who was originally from Oklahoma. For our last lesson, he went out on the course with me to play four holes. It’s not very often that I get to go out and play with a pro. He had me hitting like an LPGA pro. I kept telling him I wanted him to be my caddy/coach, and I’d start entering some tournaments. He made me feel that confident in my game. And it’s not that I can’t feel confident without him, but I really did rely on his expertise to coach me into taking the right kinds of shots.
So, I was having a nice practice session. The weather was perfect. The cute guy I had met at the driving range on Sunday was there, practicing his game, as well. He happened to mention his girlfriend was driving out cross country to move in with him. That wasn’t a surprise. I wasn’t even disappointed. I’m not exactly sitting around waiting for my prince to show up with a seven iron in his hand and a bucket of balls. I’m busy playing my own game, thank you very much.
And the point about my love relevation this evening wasn’t about meeting another golfer at the driving range. Rather, I was having an awesome evening playing my own game. When I left, I called my parents to share my gratitude for the series of refresher lessons they paid for last summer. I wanted to let my dad know how much better my swing is, and how much better I hit the ball. I wanted him to know how grateful I was for everything he and my mom have ever done to make my life better. And that’s a long list.
I wasn’t eavesdropping, but because of the way the tables were set up, my ear was right in their space, and I overheard the man talking about his time serving our country in WW2. He had been stationed in Japan. And my ear dropped out of the conversation, but I managed to hear some sound bites about Washington, DC, visiting the war memorials, their respect for Senator Bob Dole, and then their appreciation of Tom Brokow for all of his work toward recognizing the WW2 generation.
Just before they left, I had to say something. I am my mother’s daughter, after all, and when I am moved by someone or something, I have to share my feelings. I am a sap, and there’s nothing I can do about it. Anyway, I talked to them briefly about my Great Uncle Jimmy, who, when stationed in Italy, met his sweetheart, my Great Aunt Carmella, who, back in the 1950′s won a Sofia Loren look-alike contest, and how a few years ago, when the WW2 Memorial was unveiled in Washington, DC, I got to accompany them to a ceremony that was just for the men and women who served in the war. I told them how I treasured that day, how it meant so much to me to get to experience that memorial with my Great Uncle Jimmy. As I relayed the story to these strangers, I got a little choked up. In part, I felt like an idiot, but on the other hand, I could see they understood what I was feeling. And that was gratitude. I smiled at them and told them they were truly part of the Greatest Generation.
Before we parted, I also mentioned my father, and proceeded to get teary-eyed again. I told them how he was stationed at the Pentagon, which is why I grew up in the Washington, DC area. I told them about his rank and how he served in Vietnam, and what an honorable man he is. They were tickled, I think, that a young woman would even bother to connect with them on something like the military and those who bravely, dutifully and honorably served our country.
It’s easy to forget sometimes how wonderful our loved ones are. Or, it’s easy to take them for granted. I have always felt blessed for having such a solid, good family. It is everything to me. And while I have spent much of my time on this blog contemplating all kinds of loves, truly, my greatest love is for my parents. I know that no one on this planet will ever love me the way my parents love me. I have never questioned or doubted that love. It has been my true birthright. Their love for me is my strength, my happiness and my one true thing. As they grow older, I often worry. I live clear across the country from them, which was a painfully hard decision to have to make. I never imagined I would ever live more than a couple of miles away from them. And here I am, in my father’s home state of Oregon, while they’re still in my home state of Virginia, and I do my best to talk with them once or twice a day – maybe more. We’re on a Verizon family plan, thank goodness. I pray for them daily. I always think of them and wonder what they’re up to, so then I call…again. We talk so much, that it sometimes give the impression of nearness. And it’s a relief to feel like we’re not so far apart. I get to take in the laughs, the tears and the usual rapport of what’s going on with this cousin or that neighbor. They perpetuate that feeling of home for me. And then I get a little homesick. I can’t help it. I am in awe of their unconditional love and support – it’s never wavering, it’s never exhausted, and it keeps pumping like the strongest, biggest heart humanly possible. And I know I am not alone. I know I not far from home. And I know I am not unloved. It is the greatest gift I will ever know.