Thursday, May 8
8:50 p.m.
After considering my ailments, I have thought about the fact that I am not doing yoga and I’m not meditating. I had been on a path - listening to different Rinpoches teach about peace, elightenment and compassion; promising myself to take the time to meditate and do yoga; following my gluten-free diet with precision, etc. I really felt like I was finding something, discovering something - learning and improving.
And then I stumbled off that path. I wonder if this is part of the course??
I woke up still feeling queasy from the night before, but I did have a great night’s sleep. I couldn’t eat anything too sweet or heavy this morning. So I made toast from brown rice bread and drank a glass of sparkling water. At work, I still had no appetite. For lunch, I ate sprouted brown rice with a little salt and pepper and a bottle of Vitamin water.
I left work a litle early today to meet my colleague/friend at Upper Deck for the Redwings/Dallas game that started at 4:30 p.m. I got there before her and saw Mike from Michigan (from last week). He invited me to sit with him. Soon, my friend joined us. And then some of her friends. And then we met a guy who just moved here, another Redwings fan named Chris. We became a sudden cadre of Redwings support. They won 4-1.
I drank four glasses of ginger ale, some chips and salsa, and then I had a burger without the bun with a side salad. On my way home, I took the Bridgeport Village exit to pick up a gelato - half panacotta and half pistachio. It was cold outside but still I longed for the sweet, refreshing, creamy, loveliness of gelato. I walked back to my car, the cold cup of gelato in one hand, the other clasping a small, plastic spoon sweeping up curl after glorious cold curl, and I sat in my car in the parking garage to finish enjoying the treat. I was alone.
I thought about this while the nutty and caramel flavors melted in my mouth. I went to an ice cream shop by myself. I had never done that. I’ve dined out by myself. I’ve gone to movies by myself. But, I have never gone to an ice cream shop by myself before. It’s weird, when I was a teen my favorite date was going to the Baskin Robbins in the Twinbrook shopping center with my sweetie. Summer time in Virginia, with its hot, humid and languid nights, joy and refreshment came in the form of an ice cream cone. All the other young couples were there, too, scattered between a few small families.
Anyway. I am not sad about being alone. I am thoughtful and reflective about it - in seeking inner peace and in discovering my purpose.
But, it was really nice to sit quietly and still in my car and to be reflective and grateful for my gelato - and so many other blessings that have come my way.
Now, if only I can get back on track with all of that mindful, spiritual, healthy living…
